I read a post just now about another mom being grossed out by swallowing (accidentally) her own daughters saliva.

It made me want to tell her this story . . . so I shall.

Many moons ago when I was but a lass (ie tweeny little thing) I volunteered teaching swimming lessons to kids with special needs.  I would love to say I did it because I had a good heart and was committed to sharing my knowledge, but in truth, those volunteer hours were going to get me a job. A well paying job!

I worked with a 7 or 8 year old little fella with autism. It was fine. He was a bundle of energy and I was young, so it worked.

He loved blowing bubbles. So we did that a lot. I would hold him under his arms and face to face we would laugh, blow bubbles and have a grand ole time.

Yes, until. (There is always an until.)

He was phlegmy one day.

I am not sure if he had a cold, or was just swallowing to much water, but as we both surfaced for air and I threw my head back in joyous laughter, he hocked a loogie.

Yes, a solid mass of child phlegm went, like a bulls eye, directly towards my waiting face.

It was one of those slow motion moments.

I can still, to this day, see myself, with head thrown back, mouth wide open, hands holding the young lad so he is perfectly aimed.

And the slow motion moment when that chunk hit the back of my throat, and me, with laughter still lingering, unable to stop it as it slithered down, down, down and landed with a lump at the bottom of my stomach.

I tried to keep my smile as swam my dear student to the edge of the pool and sent him on his merry, and now easily breathing, way.

I tried to make light of it as I drank 2 quarts of orange juice, desperately trying to get rid of the foreign salty taste in my mouth.

But, that is not the kind of thing you can ever forget.

I still feel the texture and the flavor of that foreign snot. I recognize it was not thin string of saliva, but a hearty, chewable substance.

It was way worse than sucking back a bit o saliva that your daughter left in a licorice string.

So, my dear weird mommy . . . this one is for you. Hopefully I can make you gag just via your imagination!